ADHD body doubling
I believe in magic! Sometimes. The expanding universe is magic. A kind word at the right time is magic. And when I definitely want to get something done that I’ll definitely otherwise avoid, body doubling is magic.
Here’s an example: planning my work week. I have a handy little checklist to follow when I plan, and a cute, simple and highly functional planning system. The only problem? Planning makes me confused and a bit nauseous. I will forget that it exists. I will decide I’ve successfully finished after only writing today’s date on the top of a piece of paper.
But planning my work week makes a big difference. I need to go into boss brain, to think strategically, to make choices, to leave myself instructions. I need to write out my calendar appointments in at least two places. So I have a repeating body doubling session with a friend, first thing on a Monday morning. And I get that planning done - actually done, not ‘shut up I did it now let’s have a nap’ done. Magic!
What is body doubling?
Body doubling is a surprisingly effective ADHD support tool. At its heart, it’s doing your work at the same time as somebody else, so you can lean on their focus for inspiration, and they can lean on yours.
This is what people often do in a body doubling session:
1. Each say what you’ll do
Before you begin, you say your intention for what you’ll do during the session. If you end up doing something totally different, kei te pai, that’s okay. Saying what you hope to do makes it more likely you’ll do at least some work on that thing.
2. Choose how long to work for
You can pick whatever time period you like - so you can agree to a 15 minute session to get you moving, or a 50 minute time if you’re already in the zone. Having a set time period seems to help with getting started and with focus, because you know you can stop soon, and there’s a helpful sense of urgency.
3. Set a timer
Someone set the timer! For some reason it’s never me, which probably says something about my character but let’s not go into that. I also set my Time Timer, so I know how far we are through the body doubling session.
4. Do your work
The other person isn’t looking at you as you work: the other person is also working, and this is inspiring and motivating for some reason. And they’re relying on you too, so it helps you to stick with finding a way into the work.
You can agree before you begin that there will be no talking, or you might decide talking is fine if you’re both doing something like housework. If you’re meeting online, it may help to mute your microphone, especially if, like me, you talk to yourself as you work.
I like to meet on Zoom or FaceTime and have the video call going on my phone, so I can work on my computer, or take my phone into another room if I switch to a physical task. You can get up and move around whenever you want; you don’t have to stay onscreen or in the same room as the other person, as long as you come back when the timer goes off.
If you go off-task and do something else, that’s okay - it’s your choice. Though distractions do happen, for some reason it’s unusual during a body doubling session for people to just go lie on the sofa and scroll on their phones - and productive procrastination is still productive.
5. Stop when the timer goes off
Usually I’m using body doubling as a way to get into things that I struggle to start on and stick with, so stopping is easy. I find it important for me to stop when the timer goes off and have a break, even if just for five minutes, rather than keep working. It helps me trust myself and settle into work more during the body doubling session.
6. Tell each other how you did
“How did you go?” is a great question to ask each other at the end. It helps us reflect on how easy or hard it was to work, what we got done, or where we accidentally ended up. Whether you celebrate or sympathise, you get to encourage each other. That feels good, and good feelings are motivating!
Times I use body doubling
Arranging a body doubling session takes a bit more to set up than just going to a cafe to work, or setting a timer for 15 minutes and racing it to get my work done. Because of this, I only use body doubling when I notice that I’m putting off a task, or if I know that I usually find a task hard to get started on.
Let’s say I’m unable to get myself to work on this article, but I really want to get it done this week. Instead of toppling into the dread and despair of procrastination and self-bullying, I say to myself: Okay, bring out the big guns - it’s body doubling time. Then I book a Focusmate time for later in the day, or I ask one of my body doubling buddies if they want a session sometime soon. Once the time is set up, I relax and get on with other things, knowing that I’ll be able to get started on the task once the session begins.
On Focusmate, a body-doubling platform, I’ve body doubled with people who are using it to help them do a wild range of things: meditate, clean the house, paint a picture, write code, make study notes, have a shower, edit video, and even write a resignation letter. (Usually not all at once!)
Who can I body double with?
Body doubling can happen online or in person. A really simple way to try it out is to go on Focusmate.com. Once you sign up, you can have up to three free sessions a week. You choose a time, you turn up at that time, the platform has paired you with another person from somewhere in the world, and away you go. The check in chats are usually really brief, but you can connect for longer if you both feel like it.
Another simple way is to offer to body double with a friend who is complaining of finding it hard to get something done. It’s lovely because you both benefit, so you don’t have to feel awkward about putting someone else out.
It’s hard to know who is going to be a good fit for body doubling with you until you try. Sometimes it just doesn’t work because it’s hard to find a time or space that suits you both. That’s fine; try it with someone else! If you keep trying it with different people, sooner or later you’ll find someone who it works easily with.
It needs to be straightfoward to set it up with them, and it helps if they’re able to turn up at the time you agreed to. It’s good if you like to chat with them, but you also need to be able to stop chatting with them and get to work. It helps if you can give each other good vibes at the end of a session for the work you did, or be kind on a rough day.
Body doubling can be done in the workplace, with a workmate or team. You could alternate patterns of focus and more relaxed work. It can be done with a whole group of people, though if you do the full process, it takes a while to each say what you’ll do and to check in at the end.
Body doubling works well for people who are strongly motivated to not let other people down. Even if you don’t feel much like working, you show up because the other person also wants to get something done, or has made time to help you. Finally, if you find it hard to be on time, it’s probably a good idea to body double in person, so that timing is easier to coordinate.
Different forms of body doubling
Here are some examples of how people use a form of body doubling:
“The three-song cleaning frenzy” - collaborate to cue up three songs, start tidying as soon as the music starts, tidy anything you want, and go like crazed kittens until the third song ends - then stop!
Filling in a form while on Focusmate
Weekly catch-up and then planning time at the same time online each week
Sitting beside your child while they do homework and you do a task you’ve been avoiding
Office-wide ‘sprints’
‘Deep work time’ alongside a workmate at the same time each day
Working next to each other at a cafe
Studying together at the library (with silent times and chat breaks)
Arranging with a friend that for both of you Friday morning is creative time, and you text each other at 9am with your aims and then again at 11:30am to report back how it went
Body doubling is a great way to make sure that you’ll get started on a task. It’s a sure way get yourself to ‘touch the task’ - to spend time with it - which helps to get going on it and break down procrastination anxiety. If you arrange it in advance, it feels like getting away with avoiding working, but you don’t have the guilt and dread because you know it will actually get done.
While you’re body doubling, you’re more likely to keep with a task or return to it within the time. It feels more meaningful, interesting, and fun than working alone on a task for hours, and stops you from getting lonely and bored. Best of all, because I’m much more likely to move forward on a tricky task, it helps me to trust myself.
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